I've always been fascinated by the concept of the 'gongsi' (a Chinese word meaning common ground, connection, networking factor). The entrepreneurial success of the Chinese has been based on finding common ground for networking. It's a case of functioning with a 'we' attitude rather than the 'I' attitude.

If you look for differences, you'll find only differences. But look for similarities, and you'll find the world a wonderful place. As a Singaporean, every day I mouthed those immortal words "regardless of race, language or religion". That has made me look for similarities rather than differences. That brings me to my first 'gongsi': being a Singaporean.

When I start talking to other Singaporeans about army days, I can talk till the cows come home. Where was this guy, what is he doing now, etc, etc, occupies many of the conversations I have with other Singaporeans. And since I can speak the standard Singapore English, that adds to the gongsi.

Every community you belong to can give you that gongsi. Being an alumnus of a particular school is a gongsi. Having a certain interest is a gongsi.

Sometimes, even if we don't belong to a particular community, an awareness of a particular community gives you a gongsi with a person belonging to that community. Yesterday, I was grappling with an elderly lady in a restaurant who didn't seem to know much English. I asked, "What is this?" a few times without getting any response. I decided to switch mode. I asked, "Zhe shi shenme?" (What is this) in Chinese. Her face lit up, and the ice was broken. Although I can be visibly seen as not being a Chinese, being aware of the Chinese language gave me a gongsi.

My Indian roots are a treasure trove of common factors. I am naturally aware of the way the Indian operating system processes information. Despite having grown up in Singapore, my awareness of India means I have a lot of common ground with Indians. I must be the only Indian from Singapore who knows and enjoys three Indian languages. Hindi, the language of Bollywood, has an ability to transcend cultures and impact even non-Indians. Tamil doesn't transcend equally well, but anyone who's a part of the Tamil community has some great humor, music and richness to enjoy. And my awareness of the Malayalam language surprises both me and the Malayalee community. Being Indian also means Rama is a respected friend, and Krishna is a member of the family. When we need focus in life, who better as a mentor than Arjuna?

I cannot identify with people who choose to divide rather than unite. Did you know that there are people who come from the same place and speak the same language, but stay away from each other because they belong to different castes? I've never understood those sentiments. When we talk about cutting across race, language and religion, isn't it even easier to cut across caste?

I've tried to learn from communities who network well based on common ground. The Chinese are certainly like that. Among Indians, some communities, like Malayalees and Sindhis, are good at it. The Tamil community I belong to is not known for its networking abilities, but I've tried to break the mould. Among the communities I belong to, the Singaporean community is the one community which is good at networking. So my networking abilities can be attributed to the fact that I'm a Singaporean.

There are some phrases from songs which run in my head, reminding me of the importance of having a network of friends. Toot gayi jo ungli utti, panchon mile to ban gayi mutti (A single finger which rises can be broken, but when five come together, the fist is formed). Ulagathin selvandhan aana oruvan oru laksham sondhangal saertha manidhan (A rich man in this world is someone who has gathered a million relatives)